Kolkata Rape: Shame Is Not For Survivors

Somebody tell me what all the strong women in the Trinamool Congress are doing?

The face of an Indian rapist.

I’m obsessed with the pompous, self-righteous, son-of-a-priest, baby-faced visage of Monojit Mishra, the 31-year-old criminal who raped a law student in Kolkata, supported by two younger men—one Hindu and one Muslim, by the sound of their names (co-accused Pramit Mukherjee and Zaib Ahmed). The easiest way to unite Indian men is to pit them against women.

I request you to never forget his face when you think of rape and shame in the same sentence. Every time you hear of a rape, imagine Monojit Mishra and not the outfit of a rape survivor. Don’t waste your time analysing how she may have “brought the attack upon herself”. Just think of this man’s supercilious, boy-next-door face. Then stamp it with shame. We live in a country where a rape is reported every 15-16 minutes and these figures will only grow in the coming years as more women draw inspiration from a lesson Gisele Pelicot reminded the world of last year: ‘it’s not for us to have shame – it’s for them’

Mishra is the type of man who has demanded that rapists be hanged, a torch bearer for the beti bachao crowd. He has political influence, that much is clear from his long record of violence and how he has gotten away with it. He raped the survivor, beat her with a hockey stick, shot videos of her naked—and then threatened to shame HER by releasing the footage. He tried, like many rapists before him, to use the video as a deterrent to report the crime. Using shame against the survivor of a crime is a tried and tested strategy of Indian rapists. He also threatened to harm her family and the man she is dating.

There are so many things that stand out about this story. I’ll just list a few.

Indian men cannot handle rejection: Indian men don’t know or care about consent. The whole heinous genre of acid crimes is perpetuated by south Asian men (mostly Indian) who feel “slighted” by the “rejection” of women. So what if the women they claim to be in “love” with don’t even know of their existence. It’s almost like if a woman says no in our society, it absolves a man from what he does next. "I don't think there is any girl in college who wasn't harassed by him,” a former law student told NDTV. Yet men like this get away every day. And this impunity boosts their sense of power.

The Indian idea of marriage: Even disgusting rapists feel the need to propose marriage to the women they plan to attack. Mishra enjoyed asking women if they would marry him. It’s quite fitting really. Marriage for so many men means institutional sanction to rape a woman without having to worry about minor details like accountability or consequences. Marital rape is not criminalised in India, and marriage is a free pass to rape.

Indian women are done with being shamed for rape: Despite all the threats, the survivor went home, told her parents and they filed an FIR that night. Mishra probably calculated that the woman wouldn’t dare to speak up because of the guilt, shame and blame our society pins on survivors (some politicians have already started doing this). But survivors are done with being silent and you should expect this trend to grow.

Now I’m watching all the strong women in the Trinamool Congress, a party with which Mishra certainly had links at one time. I want to know what these women think and I want to hear them speak up loudly. A party that has been cheered for its robust representation of women in parliament needs to show us how women in power can change the way society functions.

Many of Mishra’s previous cases of assault and violence have been quietly settled. If this case goes the same way despite the courage displayed by the survivor and her parents, I will know who to blame.